88e-EmilyAnn’s Memoir-A Stitch in time 1958-Stories my Mother told me: Banishing the Mal Occhio

Introduction

(Please see posting 88d-EmilyAnn’s Memoir-A Stitch in time-Seen and Unseen, 1958)

There was great excitement in Mrs. Peretta’s Kindergarten class in October of 1958.  Each child was to prepare a short speech about who they would be for Halloween and why.  Suddenly the excitement of this holiday became greater for me.  I watched my classmates give out hints about their costumes without revealing all the details.  All my classmates were excited.  There was a sense of having our chance to shine in the spotlight.   Oh, to be so admired!  I resolved that I had to be costumed as someone fantastic, someone everyone would want to know. 

I thought a gypsy fortune teller all decked out with a colorful scarf, full black skirt, big gold earrings and lots of glittering bracelets and necklaces was sure to be someone all the kids would gather around.  We didn’t have anything at home I could use for a crystal ball but maybe Dad would lend me the deck of cards he used to play pinochle with his own father and Uncle Jesse.

Oh what fun it would be to invite my classmates over to visit on Halloween.  We could sit on the stoop while I, dressed like a gypsy I named Madame Zara, had them pull a card I’d use to tell their fortune.  I had no idea what the characters on the deck of cards stood for but Dad explained they were Jacks, Kings, Queens, Diamonds, Hearts and Spades.  I still had no idea what I was doing but decided to use the cards as a way to make up a spectacular story to amuse my classmates and new friends from school.

One evening Mom got dead serious and took the deck of cards away just as Dad was having a good laugh about my story of the marriage of the King and Queen of Diamonds.  She told Dad to put them somewhere safe where I couldn’t find them.  There was no way on earth, Mom yelled, that I was going to be a gypsy.

This is how I learned about the Zingere, the Italian word for the Roma or Romany people.  They are commonly called the gypsy people and are portrayed in the stereotypical images of fortune tellers, tinkers, or nomads travelling from place to place in colorful caravans.  They are also categorized as thieves and criminals.  Mom explained that the only Zingere she knew of were the ones she saw in Brooklyn when she was a little girl.  Although the Serrapede family did not have any personal contact or interaction with the Roma people featured in the family story of this posting, the lore, gossip and beliefs within the Italian-American community in regards to the supposed occult powers of the Zingere  were at the heart of much mental anguish the Serrapede family went through after the death of Emily’s baby brother Gerry. 

This is how I learned the full story of the events surrounding Gerry’s death.  It was much more than Gerry contracting pneumonia while the family lived in a cold-water flat that was the source of the guilt and mental torment Josie, Sam and Emily Leatrice went through in the months after Gerry’s death.

Relationship Notes

Sam and Josie (nee Muro) Serrapede were born in Agropoli, Italy.  Josie immigrated to America as a 3 year-old when her mother came to America to join her father in a new life here.  Sam came to the U.S. in the late 1920s.  They married in 1930 and lived on in the Italian-American community of Dyker Heights.  The world in which the Serrapede family lived during was located around 10^th to 13^th Avenues in the 60 numbered streets.  Josie supported the family by doing piece work from home for women’s blouse companies.  Sam worked as a shoe shiner. 

Emily Leatrice Serrapede was the born in 1931 to Sam and Josie.  Each year on April 18^th Josie gave Emily a birthday party complete with a cake, festive decorations and the presence of her aunts, uncles and cousins.  Emily was an only child for 7 years until Gerry was born.  She considered him her baby sometimes when he was happy and loved to clap hands with her and smile.  Once he got cranky, hungry or needed a change she was happy Josie was there and very much in charge, as she was in all matters related to the household.

Emily Leatrice was Sammy’s sister and EmilyAnn’s mother.  She was married to Frank Jesse Terry* from 1953 to 1980.

Gerald Serrapede was the middle child of Sam and Josie.  Gerald was born 7 years after his big sister, Emily Leatrice.  She described him as a her “little cuddle-baby” and a joy to be with.  Gerald was born in 1938.

88c-EmilyAnn’s Memoir-A Stitch in Time-Mischief, 1958

Introduction

While I still lived in Brooklyn, before the move to Linden, New Jersey in 2018, I revisited my childhood neighborhood in Dyker Heights many times.  I went up and down the hilly side streets and avenues struck by the quiet and complete absence of children playing outside.  Along 10^th through 13^th Avenues and all the side streets from 70^th through 86^th I continued my walks in search of something that indicated families with children still lived in the area.  There were none to be found.  No tricycles on the stoops, no balls left in the garden, no Hop Scotch boards drawn in chalk on the sidewalks.  It was eerie as I passed by streets lined with houses that had not changed all that much over the decades.  Despite new construction, Dyker Heights is still a place where you can see the sky, feel the sun on your face and watch the foliage and gardens change with the seasons.

It was the quiet and the absence of the activities associated with teenagers and young children that made the quiet unreal.  As a child of the 1950s I lived through times where the streets were anything but quiet.  Children as young as 3 or 4 went out to play with other children on the block.  Playtime was viewed as not only an outlet.  Going out to play was seen as part of the process of learning social navigation.  The child learned by experience.  Very often the lessons were not easy to take.  The consequences took time to absorb.  However, since the lessons learned were from experiences involving peers and elders, the potential to learn and remember well was there.

As the time for me to start Kindergarten drew near I became very restless.  My parents kept pushing me to play more outside.  I was confused.  Before all the talk about Kindergarten started, they were happy about how I preferred my toys and being inside with Mom.  Now I had to go outside and play.  That came with the caveat that I was to play with only the children Mom and Dad approved of.  My carefully selected playmates were well thought of and spoken about by others.  In the past they were a delight for me to be with but now I was bored and restlenss.  The children from up the block were more fun.  I wanted to be like them and do daring things, to run up and down the block, to not be afraid. 

This is how I got into trouble of my own doing.  The worries that I felt in the days after were also of my own doing, based on comments from the very same children I wanted to associate with.  Worries about things I’d never even thought about or knew existed.

–EmilyAnn Frances May

Sunday, March 24, 2019

Linden, New Jersey

Relationship Notes

Emily Leatrice and Frank Jesse were my parents.  They married in 1950 and bought the house where we lived in 1953.  We lived in a small, narrow house at the end of 6 row houses.  Dad worked full-time for an importing firm in Lower Manhattan.  Mom was a full-time housewife who was restless with the narrowing in her life since leaving the workforce in 1953.  Mom was a well-read woman who showed an Americanized appearance to the outside When she was alone with her parents I observes how she displayed some mannerisms that marked her as Italian-American.  She spoke basic Agropolese, the dialect of my grandparents home town of Agopoli in Italy.  When she was upset and spoke in Agropolese her voice took on a different pitch with more rising and falling in tone.  She also gestured with her hands when speaking to my maternal Grandparents Josie and Sam Serrapede.

Dad never displayed any stereotypical behaviors of either his mother who was descended from Galician Orthodox Jewish immigrants or his father who was a Third Generation Sicilian-American.  In the house, and with his parents and siblings, Dad had a way of combining Yiddish slang words and English in a way that was funny to hear.  He could not speak Yiddish or Sicilian, though.  Unlike Mom, he was neither a luke-warm Catholic nor prone to some supersititions based on a mix of Italian folklore combined with Roman Catholicism.  He was very much focused on things of this world, especially enjoying life and achieving better material status.

Mrs. Elettra Robertazzi was our neighbor who lived in the house at the end of the row at the entrance to the driveway.  She was a woman who adhered zealously to the standards of behavior expected of a widow amongst the First Generation of Italian immigrants to America in our community.  All her clothing was black.  If any repair or maintenance men came to the house, she asked another female neighbor in for coffee at the same time.  She went to mass every week and perhaps even on weekdays, too.

Mrs. Robertazzi was highly excitable and not easy to have a conversation with except if she favored you.  Often the reasons for that were hard to make out.  She got along very well with Mom, perhaps because like herself, Mom did not engage too often or at any length with the other housewives and children on the block.  That was something my Dad did and he was well received because of that, even by Mrs. Robertazzi.

Words in the story-Italian to English

faccia brutta-ugly face.

Cafone means ill-mannered, boorish person or people.

Tutta pazza means completely crazy.

Vieni qua means come here.

82f Dyker Heights 1899 to 1926: Houses with spacious gardens, streets lined with oak trees

Introduction

My Father told me that long before he was born, Dyker Heights was a place of hills, meadows, farms, brooks, streams and old fashioned houses with porches, gardens and lots of open space. 

In posting 82e1we focused on Max Jonas, the developer who transformed Dyker Heights into a residential neighborhood that included shopping and office space along some of the avenues that run through the community. 

Mid-way through his career, Jonas bought a large parcel of land in the vicinity of modern day 14^th Avenue.  Five acres of this land was used for the Graham Baseball Field.  That so much land was available went some way to substantiate what Dad had told me.  Uncle Sammy and I were curious as to just how countrified Dyker Heights was in the decades before we were born. After retrieving our first article about the baseball field, we went further back and found articles that gave further weight and substance to what Dad had told me.

We decided to present summaries of the articles along with our thoughts about them.  In this way, it will be easy to read the news, learn our responses and enter into a world of long ago that is long gone.  This trip back in time gave us a glimpse of the charming and the not so charming aspects of life in Dyker heights in the years before Max Jonas built over the rolling green land but thankfully left the maple trees on each block in place.

Topics Covered

1899:  A descriptive journey into the interior of a three story home in the new suburb of Dyker Heights.

1907:  Residents are still forced to use cesspools as completion of a sewage system stalls for the third year in a row.

1909:  Before 13th Avenue was a commercial venue it was the site of spacious homes and gardens.

1912:  Bowling Clubs and Bowling Alleys

1913:  The coming of the first apartment houses.

1917:  Access to transit adds to the appeal of the area.

1926:  A baseball game at the Graham Baseball Field.

1899:  Description of a new home in Dyker Heights

The Brooklyn Daily Eagle
Sunday, December 31, 1899

In 1899 Brooklyn was called the “suburban borough” of New York City.  Many of the wealthy, the prominent, the important from the upper echelons of Manhattan were leaving the city and heading for Dyker Heights.  City officials were aware that this meant a loss of tax revenues.  It also caused a decrease in the quality of the neighborhoods left behind in Manhattan. For 1900 construction on 100 new homes was scheduled in Dyker Heights.  The value of recently built homes were already increasing in value. 

The article lists the names of these VIPs of 1899 and the locations of their new residences.  We have not listed the names because many of the people and their companies are not commonly known.  If our readers would like to do further look-ups they can use the link for this article given in the Resources section.

The street and avenue formations were now clear.  The tarring (“Macadamizing” of 12th Avenue from 82nd to 86th Streets was completed when this article was written.  The next step was the planting of trees:  Rock Maples were to be planted 7 on each avenue and 20 on the side streets. 

The typical home had 14 rooms with a grand foyer, butler’s pantry, fire place, and library.  There was also a cellar and a laundry room.  First floor rooms were finished with Birdseye Maple and Oak.  The second floor rooms were finished with Oak and Sycamore wood.  The third floor rooms were plain Cypress wood.  It was on this last floor that servant’s quarters, a billiards room and a card room were situated.  Homes with ample garden space were also situated on 13th Avenue.  This Avenue became a commercial thoroughfare after Max Jonas took on the transformation of Dyker Heights. 

Also in the plans for development in 1900 was a stable to be used by residents in the area.  There would be a telephone connection between the stables and all the houses in the area.  Accommodations0 were also being made for beach and sunbathing at Dyker Beach Park.  A country club and several smaller clubs devoted to pastimes like card games or sports related activities were also doing well.  The parish of the Episcopal church of St. Phillip’s also was formed and fund raising efforts for the construction were underway.

82e-Home Ownership: Emily and Frank buy a house, 1953

Introduction

We are at a point in the narrative of our immediate family history—that of Josie, Sam, Emily Leatrice, Uncle Sammy and I—where the telling begins to take on some aspects of a memoir.  This is partly due to the limitations on access to Federal Census records after 1940.  The legal requirements for release of a census record is 75 years after it is recorded.  Although phone directories are presented as a census substitute they cannot be relied upon completely.  A person may have decided to have a private listing.  So, they may have been living in the same neighborhood a year or two earlier but a year or two later went private and are no longer listed.  That their name does not appear is not a reliable indicator that the person moved to a new location or passed away.

Newspaper coverage offers confirmation of what was going on in the bigger picture of society as a whole.  Key events always impact our lives in one way or another.  And while we each think of our family story as unique, we also share common bonds through being members of a neighborhood, community, city, state, region and country.  For this reason, Uncle Sammy and I will alternate news coverage and factual information from credible, respected online sources as a reference point whenever possible.  Thus for those postings that veer more towards memoir there will be integrated news coverage from that point in time so that the reader can pinpoint not only the time and place, but how we were impacted and influenced.

There will also be a shift as we focus more on sharing our personal experiences, as well as the people, places and milestones that we hope will help our readers link to similar forces and events in their own lives.  As such there will not be the kind of detailed focus on every single family member and the telling of their stories, too.  This is not possible because the forces of assimilation have led to a dispersal of the family network that existed in the earlier generations.  Cultural changes and lifestyle choices have also resulted in more individuality and a going of separate ways.  This is especially true for what we now know as the decades of divorce starting in the late 1970s.  During this time some family ties ended and remarriages or new living arrangements came together.  Divorces permanently alter the dynamics in such a way that relationships are released from the ties that tradition once dictated must be held because of the blood ties and family name.  As the third and fourth generation continues to mature, they develop a new outlook that causes them to look at their childhood relationships differently.  Who to maintain relationships with becomes complex and not always to everyone’s liking.  For this reason, relationships slipped into the past as the years went by.  We will do likewise as the narrative moves forward.  For the purpose of keeping a cohesive focus we remain committed to share the lessons learned from our family in a positive light and also out of a respect for the privacy of all with whom we have related some family members shall recede and no longer be included in the narrative.  It is impossible to follow the whereabouts once the family assimilates and disperses.  It is also impossible to get permissions to use the narratives and photos of family members we are no longer in contact with.

This posting features a family story Mom never tired of telling me since depending on the lesson she wanted me to learn.  The emphasis was on a different aspect of the event which transpired when she was pregnant to me and pressure from her in-laws to buy a house made inroads to the plans she and Dad had carefully considered but were swayed to give up.

82e1-Dyker Heights in the 1920s: From a farming to residential community

Introduction:  The Dyker Heights of long ago

I was a typical child of the late 1950s.  I loved watching TV with my parents and grandparents.  Shows like “I married Joan”, “The Loretta Young Show”, and “Private Secretary” played a big part in forming my inner world of day dreams and future plans.  I dreamt of having a dress shop that sold gowns as lovely as those Loretta wore.  If that wasn’t possible I could always be a secretary to an important executive like Susie McNamara was.  My best and closest friend would be as fun-loving and humorous as Joan.

Dad used to engage me in conversations before I went to bed as a way to get my attention away from the TV.  As I made my way to my room he’d reminisce about how Brooklyn had been when he was a boy.  He said what he loved was that you could see the sky anywhere you were.  In Manhattan there were too many buildings and you were forced to look only in front of you or to the sides.  You looked up but the sun wasn’t always in view.  I think now that he did that as a way to keep me focused on the present.  I had a way of talking about how I’d be happier when I grew up and could live in a high rise with a terrace on Park Avenue in Manhattan.

Next door to us was a very large, old fashioned house that was at odds with the rest of the street we lived on.  It was a frame house with a large, peaked roof covered with tiles.  There was an attic with round windows and all around the house lots of land.  Not only was there a large back yard but a large front yard, too.  There were even large trees in that front yard that towered over the roof.  This house seemed to me like it was transported from a country village and dropped into the lot next to our house.

Dad explained to me that the wife of our neighbor inherited that house from her father.  Before the coming of the row houses in which we lived, Dad continued, there might have been much more property around it.  He told me that even before he was born there had been working farms in Dyker Heights.  There were brooks and green meadows everywhere along with many, many trees.  There were fruit trees, ponds, even sheep.

Our community was once a desireable place for the wealthy to live in.  Dad explained to me that the way we looked at Long Island as a great place to live, once upon a time people from Manhattan looked to Dyker Heights as a great place to live.  They wanted to move freely, be in a place less crowded.  They wanted to look up and see the sky and watch the clouds, listen to the birds.

That was all very enchanting.  I went to sleep thinking maybe I’d stay in Brooklyn when I grew up.  Then the next morning when I went out to play on the stoop I’d look at the row house we lived in.  Then I’d look at the row houses up the block, across the street, and more row houses down the block.  I wondered what happened.  Then I’d quickly forget as I went off with any of the children who stopped by the gate to our stoop to invite me to see some amazing and new discovery they had made or be part of a game they wanted to play.

—EmilyAnn Frances May

Local History as a participant in the family history narrative

The way we live, shop, interact, play and socialize in a community provides a backdrop to our family histories.  The locale is also a participant in that it plays a role in structuring those interactions and influencing our lives.

In this posting Uncle Sammy and I share the discoveries we made while reviewing news coverage featured in The Brooklyn Daily Eagle during the years of the real estate boom of the mid-to late 1920s in Dyker Heights.  We could immediately connect to the way in which the community was presented to prospective home buyers back in the 1920s because many of the same qualities are used promoted in today’s real estate ads. 

The Appeal and Attractions of Dyker Heights in 1926

Our research began casually as we browsed through the search results at the Brooklyn Public Library’s database for the old Brooklyn newspapers.  The Sunday, October 17^th, 1926 edition of The Brooklyn Daily Eagle featured ads for homes on the blocks where Uncle Sammy and I grew up.  What a surprise to see photos and illustrations of newly built homes in the mid 60 and 70 numbered streets that are the very same houses we saw as children! 

What caught our eye was one ad for homes on 72^nd Street between 11^th and 12^th Avenue.  The area was described as Jonas Gardens.  That did not sound right to us.  The area always has been called Dyker Heights!  Curiosity made us read on. 

Ad for homes in Jonas Gardens by the Jonas Heights Corp. in the Sunday, October 17^th, 1926 edition of The Brooklyn Daily Eagle.  Developer Max Jonas succeeded in building a residential community but his name has faded and is forgotten as the name Dyker Heights still remains in place.

The ad for the 2 family home in Jonas Gardens included an illustration of a 2 family home.  Those features of the area were highlighted:

–Accessible to Manhattan from the Sea Beach line Fort Hamilton Station. 
–Accessible to Manhattan from the West End Line (71st or 79th street and New Utrecht Avenue). 
–Several elementary and junior high schools were in walking distance. 
–High School is about 4 blocks away.
–Convenient shopping district running along 13th Avenue from 83 through 65th Street. 

These very same features were in place when Uncle Sammy and I were growing up in the 1940s through 1950s and continue into this day!  What struck us as we continued to search through the archives was the concerted effort the developer Max Jonas made to not only develop Dyker Heights but to place his name upon it.

81a-Scenes from Old Brooklyn: Bay Ridge and the Shore Road, late 19th to early 20th Centuries

Introduction

Frank and Emily returned from their honeymoon in late May of 1950 and began their married life as residents of the Shore Road neighborhood in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, New York.  One of their favorite ways to spend a Saturday afternoon was to take a long walk along the Shore.  At other times they enjoyed discovering the sights around the other streets between Ridge Boulevard and the Shore Road.  There were cul-de-sacs along some streets where turn-of-the century gingerbread style houses were located.  In other places were step streets lined with trees and houses that had large porches and driveways that may have once led to stables.  Step streets are located at a higher elevation than the roads below them which lead to the shore. To reach the roads one must climb down a steep flight of steps built into the slope.

Emily and Frank had many interests but never enough time for them all.  One of the interests that they never fully developed was to learn the history behind the many local sights and places they enjoyed throughout Brooklyn.  With this posting we begin to feature the communities where our family lived as part of the narrative of our family history.  This shift occurs with the second generation of Italian-Americans and continues into the third generation. As the family assimilated into the larger American culture, Italy became a memory while the new environment became a vibrant reality filled with possibilities and challenges.

Relationship Notes

Emily L. Serrapede was the daughter of Sam and Josie Serrapede.  In 1950 she was 19 years old, employed as a Legal Secretary and a newlywed.  Her husband, Frank, was the son of Blanche and Al Terry*.  He worked in the Manhattan office of an importer of high quality leather.  Both Frank and Emily were doing well at their jobs.  The quality of life they were beginning to enjoy was not possible to their immigrant ancestors who came to the U.S. at the end of the 19^th-beginning of the early 20^th century.

As a young couple Frank and Emily joined book clubs and cultivated their talents through their hobbies.  Emily always wanted to know more about the mansions along Shore Road that harkened back to Brooklyn’s earlier days.  It was something that always went to the back of the burner, as she used to say.  There were so many things to do each week.  She figured the local scenery had been there for so long it could wait a while longer. 

77c-Serrapede Family in America-Emily meets Frank’s family Part 2

Introduction

Emily and Frank began dating in early 1947.  By the Summer, Frank told Emily that his parents, Blanche and Al, would enjoy having her join the family on weekends. 

When the weather was good Al enjoyed having a barbeque that included a steak, hamburgers, hot dogs, potato salad and all the fixings like different kinds of relishes and also lemonade and iced tea.  During these visits Als brothers and sisters joined for the meal or stopped by for coffee, dessert and conversation.  For this type of informal family gathering, guests used the downstairs entrance and sat around the long dining table next to the built in bar in the finished basement. 

The basement was not really a basement since it was not below ground.  It was actually the first floor of the house.  The garage was on level with the first floor which gave it the look and feel of a basement since the entrance passed through the garage.  Once inside, the rooms were bright since there were windows along the wall which faced the next house and enough sunlight coming in.  When bright sunlight shone into these rooms while the electric ceiling lights were on Emily noticed just the difference from the  soft lighting used in the livingroom and kitchen upstairs.  The light from the lamps Blanche and Al had upstairs were not good for reading.  When Emily described this kind of lighting Josie explained that it was mood lighting, meaning it was intended to have a restful, relaxing feeling to it.

The second time Emily met Frank’s younger sister was at one of the barbeques.  She noticed that Maureen’s face had many breakouts.  Before meeting Maureen, Frank told Emily that his kid sister became reclusive after she entered junior high school.  Frank attributed this to the teasing Maureen got at school because of her worsening acne condition.

Maureen compensated for not having many friends at school by getting very close to her Mom and the tenants who lived upstairs.  She was learning how to keep a record book of expenses for her mother.  She also was learning how to bake by helping her Mom and the 20+ year old daughter of the tenants upstairs.  Maureen loved serving the food and baking for her brothers.  She also enjoyed cleaning up because she had a chance to be in charge of the kitchen and direct her brothers in what tasks were theirs and where to put the baking equipment and dishes once they had been dried. 

In her spare time Maureen enjoyed doing crossword puzzles and making potholders with stretchy loops she wove around a small metal frame.  She also developed a keen interest in searching for sales on aprons, oven mits, kitchen towels and baking equipment.  Maureen browsed the papers daily and also clipped coupons for Blanche and the tenant upstairs.  Maureen also gleaned enough from the daily news articles to carry on conversations with the elderly neighbors on the block.  Most teenagers weren’t interested in where there was a sale on laundry soap or flour but all a neighbor had to do was ask Maureen what were the best buys that week and she would stop to talk to that neighbor.  But to other teenagers, she was aloof.  Emily sometimes said Maureen was “14 going on 50” because she was so at ease with older people.  She also dressed down rather than up so that she looked more like a housewife than a teenage girl.

Emily had been talking to all her Serrapede and Errico relatives Blanche and Al’s silver coffee service, the silver ice bucket, the television set and all the guests Al and Blanche entertained.  She had not mentioned anything about Maureen’s breakouts to Josie and Sam before they met the family for the first time.  After that meeting Emily never expected what happened the next time she proudly recited the story about she and Frank got her friendship ring at an estate sale or how Blanche had a silver coffee service.  Josie called Emily in and sat her down in the kitchen while Sam tried to look busy with putting the dishes away.  When Josie yelled at Emily to open her eyes and question Blanche and Al’s priorities Emily was stunned into silence as her parents said they were going to talk some sense into her.

77c-Serrapede Family in America-Emily meets Frank’s family Part 1

Introduction

Emily met Frank, her future fiancé, in early to mid-1947 during her Junior year at Bay Ridge High School.  Frank was stationed in Corpus Christi Texas during WWII and served in the U.S. Navy from 1945-1947.  Upon returning to Brooklyn he began to look in earnest for a steady girlfriend.  He missed the people he met in Texas very much since the experience afforded him an opportunity to meet people, for the first time in his life, who accepted him on his own merits without the kind of over analyzing and cool reception he got from the parents of the girls he dated when he returned to Brooklyn.  The reason for this treatment was based in the bias the parents exhibited when they learned of his Frank’s mother was Jewish.  For Emily, though, the faith of Blanche, his mother, didn’t diminish the affection she had for him.  In fact when Frank told her she replied, “I’m dating you, not your Mother.  Besides you’re her son.  I’m probably going to think your Mom is just as wonderful as you are!”

Frank never went back to Texas although in later years he always recalled his time there with great clarity and spoke very well of his officers and all the people he met.  It wasn’t very long after Frank met Emily that he invited her to meet his parents, his siblings and his father’s business associates.  When the door to the family’s home on 14^th Avenue between 70^th and 71^st Streets opened, Emily always said it was an entrée into a different lifestyle and way of living, one she never thought existed in the small world of Dyker Heights.  It was the kind of life style she associated with suburban living in Long Island or Connecticut.

Relationship Notes

Emily L. Serrapede was the daughter of Sam and Josie (nee Muro) Serrapede.  She was born at Coney Island Hospital in 1931 and attended public schools in Dyker Heights.  She graduated with a commercial diploma from Bay Ridge High School in January 1948 and went to work full-time as a legal secretary in the Law Office of Charles Graham on 65^th Street in Dyker Heights.  Emily was a second generation Italian-American.

Frank J. Terry* was born in Brooklyn in 1927, the first son of Al and Blanche Terry.  He attended Shallow High School but did not graduate because of an overriding desire to serve our country in WWII.  His parents gave their consent and Frank enlisted in the Navy two months before graduation.  Upon his honorable discharge in 1947, Frank went to work at Fleming-Joffee an importer of exotic leathers.  Al, his father was an executive at the firm. 

Blanche Terry* was the daughter of immigrants from Galicia, a country once part of the Austrian-Hungarian empire.  Her parents, Ben and Tillie, immigrated to New York City in the early 20^th century.  Blanche was their first child born in 1905.  She had a younger sister, Rebecca whom everyone called Belle.  Blanche also had a brother, David who was still alive when Emily met the family and another brother Irving.  Blanche’s family lived in the Yorkville section of Manhattan until the late 1910s when they moved to the Midwood Section of Brooklyn.  Ben and Tillie then bought a large house on Avenue O which they turned into a boarding house. 

Blanche’s birth name was Bessie but she used the name Blanche after she graduated school and worked as a model for a New York furrier.  She told Emily “Bessie is too old fashioned for a model’s name.  Blanche is so much more elegant.”

Blanche and Al were married in 1926 at Brooklyn Boro Hall.  Her parents were scandalized by her going off with the son of Sicilian immigrants.  She always said it was a love match and left it off at that.

Al Terry* was a second generation Sicilian-American who was born and spent his early years in Manhattan’s Fourth Ward, a neighborhood known for its difficult and often dangerous living conditions.  His father and mother lived in a tenement as did his paternal grandparents just a few blocks away.  The family were not poor, however.  They operated a grocery store and macaroni manufacturing facility in the Fourth Ward managing to earn enough money to keep both businesses going for many years.  In the late 1910s Al’s parents bought a two family house in Dyker Heights.  Al went to work as an bookkeeper at a leather company after graduating school.  In the 1940s Federal Census Al described his profession as a “commodities salesman”.  When Emily first met Al he had risen to an executive level position at Fleming-Joffe.

Alfred, Robert and Maureen:  Blanche and Al’s other children and Frank’s siblings.  They will be featured in the next posting.

Belle and David were Blanche’s sister and brother-in-law.  They lived in Manhattan.  David owned a millinery factory with his brother.  Belle had worked in Lord & Taylor Department store at one point.  The family often spoke of Belle modeling hats during the time she worked there.  Like Blanche, Belle had an appreciation for the high quality department stores in Manhattan. 

Dr. Goodman and Sylvia Goodman were close friends of Al and Blanche.  Dr. Goodman’s offices were located in Manhattan.  Blanche sometimes stopped by his offices when she took EmilyAnn into Manhattan for one of her Grandmother-Granddaughter days at Macy’s.  Dr. Goodman either advised Blanche or was her surgeon when it was determined she had breast cancer.  Blanche underwent a radical mastectomy that included removal of the breast and the lymph glands under her arm.  This was a standard procedure in the early 1940s when the surgery was done.  Blanche never had a recurrence of any growths nor did she suffer from any form of cancer after the surgery.

Blanche, Emily, Al and Frank always referred to the Goodmans as “Dr. Goodman and Sylvia” or “Dr. and Sylvia Goodman”.  For this reason, it is difficult to recall his first name.  EmilyAnn found him to be very kind and very interested in the stories she told him.  He was very taken by a story she made up about the paper weight on his desk that had a great adventure rolling out of his office and all the way down Fifth Avenue to Rockefeller Center to see the Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall.

*See Note before Resources section

Family Story:  Tuesday nights at Blanche and Al’s

Emily’s favorite visits during the early days of dating Frank were during the week.  One night each week Blanche and Al hosted an informal get-together in the early evening.  Emily told EmilyAnn that Frank always picked her up around 7 p.m. so they would have time to converse with the visitors.

“Blanche greeted us at the door looking as if she had just come from the beauty parlor instead of having been up from early in the morning to make her husband and children breakfast and then move on to her housework,” Emily remembered.  And even though it was a weeknight Blanche and Al’s younger children, Robert and Maureen, were expected to have finished their homework and be ready for the visitors, too.

Since Blanche and Al were expecting visitors everyone entered by the front door located on the porch up a flight of stairs from the sidewalk.  The outside of the house did not look like much.  The large flower pots at the top of the steps had large succulent type plants in them.  The porch and stoop were always swept clean and in hot weather a green awning was open above the porch and the upstairs apartment windows.  The front door was polished wood with small glass panes at the top. 

Al always explained why the house was so non-descript from the outside.  He and Blanche did not want to attract unwanted attention to the house or the family.  This is why there were no fancy curtains or window displays or even an elaborate garden or fancy potted plants outside.  It was better that the neighbors did not know what the family owned or how well he was doing in business.  It was his way of feeling protected from thieves who might target his home for a break-in.

Christmas Break 2017: The Dyker Heights Lights

Christmas 2017

Every year I return to the neighborhood where I grew up.  As I walk up and down the blocks to the heart of Dyker Heights many memories come back.  Some happy, some sad.  Overall I still admire the beauty, the seclusion and the sense of continuity that flows through the area.  This is especially true when I return at Christmas.  As I get closer to the area between 80th to 84 Streets between 11th to 13th Avenues, the entire landscape transforms into an electric Christmas wonderland.

This year the lighting displays were more subdued.  There were no animated figures or loud music.  The crowds were absent, too.  This made this year closer and more intimate for me.  Small groups of people, many with children, congregated in front of the mini-mansions for fabulous photo ops.  As soon as the flash went off, though, they moved on and as a result the sidewalks were easily navigated.

The mini-mansions looked beautiful and grand this year.  What I liked the most was that the smaller houses, similar in size to the one I grew up in, also had a chance to shine with well thought out ornaments, displays and lights.  I decided to take pictures of these homes with just a few of the mini-mansions.  I hope you enjoy this short tour of the neighborhood where I grew up.  In the year ahead you will learn more about Dyker Heights as the story of the lives of my Mom and maternal Grandparents continues to unfold.

The photos I took may be reused freely.  A link back to this blog would be a great way to say “Thanks!”

Dyker Heights Christmas Lights 2017

 

51-Serrapede Family in America April 18, 1931: It’s a girl! (Part 2)

(This posting is a continuation of 51-Serrapede Family in America April 18, 1931: It’s a girl! in which we considered the day Emily L. Serrapede was born and some of the issues she faced growing up as an Italian-American.  In this posting the discussion expands to experiences Uncle Sammy and I had.)

The Detail in the Birth Certificate that might point to an answer

Close-up of the birth certificate.

I think I found a clue to Emily’s sensitivity regarding her ethnicity. Looking at her birth certificate I found the following: Color or Race-It. The It. means Italian.

Southern Italians were considered a race unto themselves. This was not in a good way. They were seen as incapable of joining the mainstream. An article from a 1914 edition of “The World’s Work” expresses sentiments held at that time about why this was so. It came down to this: Southern Italians were non-Caucasians. Therefore, the thinking went, they’ll never make it into the mainstream. In the 1910s the sentiment against Southern Italians was very negative. Their admission to this country was thought to have a detrimental effect on society. Census records list Italians as members of the Caucasian race but outside of their immigrant community the treatment was not always considerate or kind. When I was a child I was told by outsiders that we were “Wops” because our Grandparents were all here illegally. “Wop” meant “without passport.” Recently I’ve read it also could mean “White on paper.” Meaning for things like the census records Southern Italians were entered as Caucasian or White but in reality they were treated as “others”.

To what degree Emily experienced negative treatment I do not know. She never told me of any events in her life that would be a contributing factor to the strong show of emotions I witnessed when I did things like ask to get my ears pierced or why she wouldn’t teach me how to speak Italian as good as she did.